An Ode To Nursery Bugs

An Ode To Nursery Bugs

Ah ha we meet again my friends
You scoundrels and you fiends
You’ve clearly had some time to prep
You’re well primed and you’re preened
You sit and lurk on surfaces
You watch and laugh on toys
Then seize your chance and transfer onto little girls and boys
So innocent and pure they were
Until they trod your lair
But little did those poor souls know that you were hiding there
And one by one you floored them by your cruel and vicious means
Shattering the peace and quiet of which their parents dreamed
A small sneeze here, a quick cough there and soon enough there’s more
A chest infection, tonsillitis, EVERYTHING is sore
Day by day another kid is feeling pretty rough
It’s universal knowledge that these first few months are tough
The doctor’s overflowing and the pharmacy is bare
And you just sit there grinning
No you simply do not care
Now rest assured these hero kids will learn to fight you back
And when they do I’m telling you their cells will give you flack
One day you’ll be running scared
But for now it’s safe to say
You’re the undisputed champion
So bugger off, ok?

Below: Ideas for dealing with a nasty bout of tonsillitis*
*I would definitely NOT suggest you give the gin to the baby

Speak soon


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